• The time and length of the visits must be pre-arranged and only rarely changed.
• Directions given by the monitor must be followed.  No discussion of the rules with the child present.
• There should be no attempt to get the monitor to side with anyone.  The monitor must remain impartial.
• Child must be within the monitor's hearing and sight at all times.
• No use of foreign language or words unfamiliar to the monitor.
• No whispering, passing notes, or hand signals.  No swearing or cuss words.
• No negative comments about the other parent, caretaker, child or child's siblings.
• No discussion of the court case, social worker or related matters, such as visitation restrictions.
• *No tickling, hugging, kissing, or holding, unless freely initiated by the child.
• **The visiting person (if an adult) is responsible for managing the child's behavior.  No spanking, hitting or threatening.  The monitor will help, if needed.
• Unless previously agreed upon, the visiting person will be the only person allowed into the visit.
• No visits while the visiting person appears to be under the influence of alcohol or illegal drugs.
• No loud talk, name-calling, or ridiculing. No questioning which makes the child uncomfortable.
• Visiting persons should try not to appear lonely or needy. This may cause child to worry or feel guilty.
• The monitor or child is not to be used to communicate with the other parent/caretaker.
• No promises like "you'll live with me soon (go to Disneyland)," unless already agreed on by the court.
• No prolonged or tearful good-byes.

Without prior approval of the court, child's therapist and/or the child's protective services worker:

• No exchange of gifts, money, food or cards.
• No exchange or taking of photographs, videotapes or audio tapes.
• *No physical contact with the child such as lap sitting, combing hair or stroking any other part of the body, hand holding, arm around the shoulders, prolonged hugging, wrestling, horse-playing, tickling, changing diapers or accompanying the child to the bathroom, even if requested by the child.
• **If there is a sustained petition of sexual abuse or a criminal conviction of sexual abuse against the visiting party, that person will not be responsible for managing the behavior of the child.  The monitor or another visiting adult will do it.

I have read the rules and agree to follow those checked in Section 1 :___________________________

I have read the rules and agree to follow those checked in Section 1 and 2: _______________________

Visiting Person's Signature: ________________________________ Date:__________________

Monitor's Signature:  ______________________________________ Date: __________________

This page last updated on March 17, 2003